Ladies & Gents, if you would be so kind, Please donate to my cause.
The Poor College Student Charity.
We will be accepting financial aide in the form of cash, check, and money order.
Please and fucking thank you. May Buddha Bless you. Etcetera.
I have $67 in my bank account, a phone bill due on the 24th, and no job or car. Looks like it's time to start a money pool.